The Anxious Runner

Anxiety is part of my life … and has been, as far back as I can remember. Whatever caused it – genetics, trauma, family dynamics, life circumstance – doesn’t matter much. What does matter to me, is that it’s always there. For those who are fortunate enough not to be able to relate, let me put it this way: my mind tends to catastrophize. A lot. It’s heavy. It’s taxing. And I’ve paid a price, in many ways … as have those close to me.

Any psychologist will tell you that we all have stress in our lives. The key is learning to manage it so that it doesn’t take over. Take it from me: this is easier said than done – but it’s true. You cannot side-step stress. What you can do, however, is learn ways to cope with the downstream effects of that stress, including the anxiety it can create.

In my case, running is my coping strategy.

I run to free my mind of the thoughts and worries that tend to accompany me in my day. When I run, I am truly free. It is the closest thing that I have to “mindfulness” or “being present.”

People ask me if I listen to music or audio books or podcasts when I run. I don’t. I run (blessedly, IMHO) free of audio distraction. All I have when I run is my breathing. My heartbeat. The sound of my feet hitting the pavement about 176 times a minute. I hear birds. I notice the sun or, as has been the case more frequently of late, the cold embrace of a late-winter wind. I smile and nod to other runners who cross my path. They smile and nod back, almost 100% of the time.

At the end of the day: while I live with anxiety, I can get out for a run and free myself from its shackles. Running helps me reset, and keeps me ahead of the ambient stress – at least for a while.

I’m also privileged enough to have access to outside help if I need it. I have a family who loves me. I have good friends. I have sufficient financial resources to seek professional help if things get particularly challenging.

But not everyone is so fortunate – and that’s while I run for the Royal.

The Royal Ottawa Foundation for Mental Health provides critical services to help those in our community who suffer from mental health challenges. It offers clinical services for those in urgent need of care via the Royal Ottawa Mental Health Centre. It conducts groundbreaking research into the functioning of the brain. And it advocates for those who suffer in silence, and lack a voice.

On May 27, I’m running the Ottawa 10k presented by Otto’s Ottawa to raise awareness and funding for the Royal. I’m asking my network of family, friends and colleagues to support me in this effort by considering a donation to this incredibly worthy cause.

Would you help me to help the Royal help others? Please consider a donation by clicking this link. Any amount is greatly appreciated. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your time and consideration.

–Tracy